Happy Mollyween

Molly Sims tweeted this yesterday:...which led to this photo:I'm a little surprised, because it flies in the face of this campaign (almost eerily so). So let's help Molly tiptoe around the controversy with a couple of spooooky orange-and-black bikinis from 2004.Whaddaya say, Molly? Maybe go as an SI model instead?

Here Comes the Bride, All Dressed in White

A belated congratulations to Molly Sims on her nuptials last week.I wonder if she got that diamond bikini she had on her registry.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Six

I bemoaned the absence of Molly’s abs when she appeared in a recent One-Piece Wednesday. Let’s make up for it here.

Dish

I loved Chrissy Teigen’s recent tweets about Yelp reviewers:…and I decided to hunt down the review she quoted. I googled it, but instead I discovered Chrissy’s food blog.It’s awesome—she remains a fun and funny writer, and she clearly loves cooking and eating.

So, in celebration, here are some SI models with food.

One-Piece Wednesday: Molly Sims, 2003

The one bad thing about featuring Molly Sims (38 today) on One-Piece Wednesday is you can't see her magnificent abs. Seriously, you could chop onions on her stomach.I'll have to feature that tummy another day. Happy birthday, Molly!

Your 2011 Rookies

The Rookie Class of 2011 has been announced. Let’s take a look at where each of them fits in the swimsuit model spectrum.

Kate UptonShe’s the most classic-looking, all-American, SI-type swimsuit model of the bunch. I see her as today’s Tori Praver.• • •Alyssa MillerThose are some major-league eyebrows. I see her as Yasmeen Ghauri’s face with Yamila Diaz’s lips.• • •Shannan ClickLooks to me like a combination of Molly Sims and Carolyn Murphy.• • •Kenza FouratiThis Tunisian model is highly unusual for SI. Most of the photos I found of her online show her in moody black & white fashion shots. It took me a while to think of an equivalent, but I think her look has the Frenchy, art-house ennui of a Laetitia Casta.• • •Izabel GoulartI figured that Daniella Sarahyba would not be in the 2011 issue. So they needed another 26-year-old Brazilian model to step up, and they found Izabel. If Daniella smiled less, they’d look even more similar.• • •The folks at Lowdown Blog place their bets on 2011's cover girl, and they put Julie Henderson at #3, after Anne V and Irina Shayk. (They also refer to the 2011 issue as the 49th. Meanwhile, the guys at Bro Bible seem to think it’s the 38th. Guys—it’s the 47th.)

9/22/11 ETA: Holy cow, it's the 48th. What's my problem? Math is hard.

Valentine's Week Part Four

Jewelry is a surefire hit, though you’d think a 30 million dollar bikini would be more attractive as a swimsuit and/or as a piece of jewelry.Nothing against the lovely Molly Sims, of course. But the "bikini" seems more like a dare than an legitimate article of clothing.

Well, It’s a One-Piece

The Swimsuit Issue’s Facebook page recently put up this sneak preview of 2011’s bodypainting excursion. Here’s the mystery model:And, um…

Hm.

I love a sneak preview, but sometimes it’s better to wait until the cookies are done baking. This looks like a shot taken at a sanatorium during some kind of doomsday plague outbreak.

Let’s cleanse the palate (no pun intended) with a finished product: another painted one-piece, possibly the Platonic ideal of an SI bodypainting pic. Marisa Miller, 2004.And just for fun, here’s Molly Sims having somehow called that swimsuit into existence.
By the way, when SI posted the preview work-in-progress, someone commented that they could see nipple and asked if it was legal. What do you know, the picture seems to have disappeared.